BDSM
14 Apr 2020


This is the story for the dom who wants to collar me......The perfect Sub is hiding away at the core of my being, but she is behind a million walls and scared to trust. She has been hurt and taken advantage of her whole life. Every single time she has been let out she gets hurt. I keep attracting doms who feel they might be up for the challenge of getting to her. I'm sure they can see her there behind her walls and hope to reach her. My sexy dom friend has lured her out a little bit , but she turns her tail and runs back behind her walls, afraid that he will hurt her like all the others that have wounded her in past. She bears the emotional scars of battles past, but she still shines with beauty, grace and humility. She wants to be a good girl so badly. She responds to his will even when I try to stand in front of her to protect her. I am stubborn, defiant and ready to put up a fight for her. She wants to please because it makes her happy to see others happy. She feels something primal when she hears him growl like a predator in her ear. She wants his spank and to call him Sir, but I rail against her and tell her no we are not owned. We will not be owned. Accepting a collar, no matter what the conditions is not what she needs. But she disagrees with me and looks out to my sexy dom friend, drawn to him and cries with wanting.

I tell her she deserves to be cherished and loved above others. I don't want her be compared to those who are more conventionally sexy and slim with gorgeous boobs that want willingly to be beaten. I tell her she is special and if any dom were to be worthy of her obedience, he will have to earn it with patience and not with ridiculous head games. He will not make her feel lesser, he will not humiliate her, he will not cage her or make her do things she shouldn't. Because I know she has done some damn stupid and dangerous shit in past at the hands of men who abused her trust. I fear for her safety with every fibre of my being. She looks at me from behind her walls, conflicted about coming out and trusting my sexy dom friend. Maybe she is finally getting the message that she's safer hidden behind her walls where she won't fall for someone who will betray her trust again. I thought we could trust him, but he showed us he can be cruel and right now I'm not convinced we should ever see him again. But she is too kind and shakes it off while I boil with rage. She wants to please him and be a good girl and doesn't want him to abandon her. She feels she needs him like the need to breathe. I'm not letting her go without fighting for her honour. He needs to convince me that he is worthy of her.

The struggle is real. I'm not entirely convinced he is up to the task. He has unknowingly left her abandoned, raw, open and drowning in her own tears when he should have cared for her longer after she opened up to him. He left her in the good hands of another lover, but she was his responsibility. He didn't know, but it was me that said we were fine. The perfect sub in the core of my being was a sobbing and lost mess when he left. I tried to stop her from reaching out to him, her kind heart won out, but she didn't tell him she had been broken. She didn't want to lay her worries on him, fearing he would find her unworthy of his time. So she purged her feelings in abandonment and I led her back behind her safe walls again. I don't know what to do next. I can't form the words in his presence for her. He thinks she can speak up for herself. She cannot. He did something to her that was wrong and she went mute and rocked in the corner.

I'm sorry that this isn't a sexy exciting story. There was a lot of fun and sexy adventures while this all happened. And no I am not crazy, this is just my way of explaining the way my mind is battling against itself to not just submit too easily. I'm hesitant, intrigued and drawn to my sexy dom friend in a way that quite simply frightens me. Wish me luck.

Tags: bdsm, sub, submission, submissive


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