After chating to people in the rooms and at meets it seems there is a small minority on here that think it is ok to waste peoples time. There are males posing as couples and others that go cold when ask to meet or even worse do not show up at arranged places. This is an Adult site set up for people that want to make friendships and enjoy life it is about time people started behaving like Adults.
There are great people on here that i have met at the meet and those that want to play games go to a site like facebook they have plenty of games there.
Quote by misterpb59 After chating to people in the rooms and at meets it seems there is a small minority on here that think it is ok to waste peoples time. There are males posing as couples and others that go cold when ask to meet or even worse do not show up at arranged places. This is an Adult site set up for people that want to make friendships and enjoy life it is about time people started behaving like Adults. There are great people on here that i have met at the meet and those that want to play games go to a site like facebook they have plenty of games there.
will only add..... if you know they are singles... posing as couples... why not report them... Each report is given a week to verify... If they dont verify by then, all profiles are changed. As for anything else.... sorry heard this once to often i will keep quiet
I tried to raise this issue before. However, a troll attack convinced me that others see this site differently.
Those who now read our updated profile get the jist of our disappointment.
We to thought this was a site for actual meets and real play.
Someone famous said something along that line that fantasy never evolves into reality.
I sincerely believe that some players hope never to have to make their cybersex real.
We do understand about nerves, or last minute changes. Sure, we all have them.
However, something else is happening here.
One thing is the abuse of this site by those using it to maintain cyber-relationships and the other is the failure of some to appreciate what it actually takes for a woman, in particular, to put herself out there for REAL.
Sadly, I also think, if another non sexual event pops up it seems so easy to walk away from the sexual event they had committed to.
We had one guy actually text us to say he was on the way.
Of the four invited to our last event, none showed up.
We did not hunt most of these guys they showed up keen and willing.
Sadly our gang bang for Sunday night is now compromised and we will be lucky to get three players.
We still would like to feel we can still pick and choose players for different events and say no to those who don't have the
'spark' for us.
PLEASE guys and gals if you are cyberhappy just say so. Maybe you can get a little cyber community going and keep your cyber dream alive!
Happy playing to all in 2013
Chris
Quote by Monica44 I tried to raise this issue before. However, a troll attack convinced me that others see this site differently. Those who now read our updated profile get the jist of our disappointment. We to thought this was a site for actual meets and real play. Someone famous said something along that line that fantasy never evolves into reality. I sincerely believe that some players hope never to have to make their cybersex real. We do understand about nerves, or last minute changes. Sure, we all have them. However, something else is happening here. One thing is the abuse of this site by those using it to maintain cyber-relationships and the other is the failure of some to appreciate what it actually takes for a woman, in particular, to put herself out there for REAL. Sadly, I also think, if another non sexual event pops up it seems so easy to walk away from the sexual event they had committed to. We had one guy actually text us to say he was on the way. Of the four invited to our last event, none showed up. We did not hunt most of these guys they showed up keen and willing. Sadly our gang bang for Sunday night is now compromised and we will be lucky to get three players. We still would like to feel we can still pick and choose players for different events and say no to those who don't have the 'spark' for us. PLEASE guys and gals if you are cyberhappy just say so. Maybe you can get a little cyber community going and keep your cyber dream alive! Happy playing to all in 2013 Chris
I agree with you whole heartedly Chris, But from a singles guys point of view unfortunetly its not just restricted to the singles.. there are a huge amount of couples on this site who dont even bother to reply or to say "thanks but no thanks". I, like you have raised this previously and got the same reaction... with people trying to justify why they dont answer msg's or expaining it away as the message originators fault. I guess this has gone from a swingers site to an adult version of facbook in a lot of peoples minds. Anyway, thats enough from me and on with life... who knows it may just improve in 2013.........
Well I guess with 116,261 members as of today ... you will get 'time wasters' ...in saying that tho ... not everyone comes here to play ... some come just for the chat.. others simply to perve ... cause no where does it say that you have to play to enjoy what this site has to offer
Lots of different reasons bring people to a site like this ....... Ive found people here who have become real life friends who i LOVE spending time with ...
So yeah if you guys do find people who are being deceptive.... Please consider giving this information to a mod so we can deal with it ...
Thanks for reading and have a great weekend ....
Quote by jazz_10 Well I guess with 116,261 members as of today ... you will get 'time wasters' ...in saying that tho ... not everyone comes here to play ... some come just for the chat.. others simply to perve ... cause no where does it say that you have to play to enjoy what this site has to offer Lots of different reasons bring people to a site like this ....... Ive found people here who have become real life friends who i LOVE spending time with ... So yeah if you guys do find people who are being deceptive.... Please consider giving this information to a mod so we can deal with it ... Thanks for reading and have a great weekend ....
Hi Jazz Many thanks for the insight. A previous comment mentioned that Swingers Heaven is becoming a social place like Facebook. I am glad you get friends here but I see with all the profile details particularly what you are 'in' to convinces me that the original intent was to actually advertise yourself as a real player in active sexual lifestyle. So I guess SH has morphed. I was wondering whether SH could be partitioned between the two intentions? Even if in the profile list of what you are looking for. So SH could add 'social', 'cybersex' and 'real play time'. Then we could see instantly where we are all at. Just a thought. Cheers Chris
On my profile I dont have anything that i am looking for or into ... It actaully states I am a moderator and do NOT play ... so not quite sure where you got that from......
I think "most" people are honest in what they are looking for ...... I think some confusion occurs when people dont read profiles .... As I see alot of profile who state not interested in play just chatting ... I think most of us are capable of working out who is honest and who is hiding their true status ... ShRep is great for checking out people ....
Adding social chat and cyberfun would be a great idea and I'd suggest taking those to admin ... I think it would be helpful to those who do take the time to read profiles ... its a great suggestion
I think most sites change .. with such diverse backgrounds and what people expect from the sites they are on ... and in the time I've been here and then became a moderator I have seen many changes, and the dynamics of the group have certainly grown and changed.
Thanks for the input Chris ... its much appreciated.
Jazz
edited to add ... altho is says i joined nov 17 2012 ... my original profile was accidently deleted.. i've been here well over two years now .
Quote by misterpb59 After chating to people in the rooms and at meets it seems there is a small minority on here that think it is ok to waste peoples time. There are males posing as couples and others that go cold when ask to meet or even worse do not show up at arranged places. This is an Adult site set up for people that want to make friendships and enjoy life it is about time people started behaving like Adults. There are great people on here that i have met at the meet and those that want to play games go to a site like facebook they have plenty of games there.
Hi mate, I cant figure it out, there are that many time wasters. i have just had an influx of people sending freinds requests and not returning msgs. Its frustrating and give me the you know whats. It also gives the genuine people a bad name. Id love to see a name and shame section as something needs to be done. Happy new year all
Quote by Monica44 I tried to raise this issue before. However, a troll attack convinced me that others see this site differently. Those who now read our updated profile get the jist of our disappointment. We to thought this was a site for actual meets and real play. Someone famous said something along that line that fantasy never evolves into reality. I sincerely believe that some players hope never to have to make their cybersex real. We do understand about nerves, or last minute changes. Sure, we all have them. However, something else is happening here. One thing is the abuse of this site by those using it to maintain cyber-relationships and the other is the failure of some to appreciate what it actually takes for a woman, in particular, to put herself out there for REAL. Sadly, I also think, if another non sexual event pops up it seems so easy to walk away from the sexual event they had committed to. We had one guy actually text us to say he was on the way. Of the four invited to our last event, none showed up. wow after looking at Monica's pics I can't believe guys wouldn't turn up lovely lovely lady and hot with a great arse ..lol I have meet a few people up my way and I have probably been lucky ......I work on if you say your turning up turn up .....Monica you may need to come up to the Hunter sample the reds and get something special memories while your here :) We did not hunt most of these guys they showed up keen and willing. Sadly our gang bang for Sunday night is now compromised and we will be lucky to get three players. We still would like to feel we can still pick and choose players for different events and say no to those who don't have the 'spark' for us. PLEASE guys and gals if you are cyberhappy just say so. Maybe you can get a little cyber community going and keep your cyber dream alive! Happy playing to all in 2013 Chris
Just because we are on a sex related site it doesn't mean we are obligated to meet or have sex with anybody we feel no connection with.
I have been accused of being a "time waster" in the chat room when I don't immediately respond to someone I don't know from another state?!? just who is wasting whose time??
I keep adjusting my profile to make it clear as to what I am looking for, but nobody really reads it. There's such a skewed idea of what 'swinging" really is, and I don't feel it's about being someone's random wank fodder or a free hooker service.
I have just been slammed by yet another married man who has no respect for what my husband and I agree are the boundaries in our 'consentual relationship'. Something must be working; we are coming up for our 20th wedding anniversary soon.
We have been active swingers for about 8 yrs now; starting out some of the clubs here in Perth that no longer exist.
Being a true swinger is about trust and good communication. It isn't just about sex, it's also about mixing with other consentual couples. We had a great NYE - we went to one party with several couples from Red Hot Pie, then ended up with some others from Swingers Heaven (together).
Tonight we are going to a quiz night with people we know from - swinging. In August we are going to a wedding for a couple we met through - swinging.
We were in Melbourne at the weekend and met a wonderful person at the cricket and the casino - oh dear, they were swingers too!
We are friends with a young guy from here. We only know him socially, so far (that's how we prefer to meet people). Sadly for him, he recently picked up a sexually transmitted infection (chalmydia)from a couple on this site. "Oh, but I always use condoms" you would argue? well guess what" ? he used condoms! he had oral sex with the female of the couple, and within weeks had a discharge and was peeing razor blades...THAT easy!
As a couple we take as much care as possible, but we know the risks and accept we can't assign the blame should something happen. The only form of safe sex is no sex at all. Perth now has the highest rate of STi's in any developed city; much of this has been blamed on the influx of FIFO workers from other states, and their frequency of travel to countries like Thailand when they are on their break.
So back to the main argument, people shouldn't be accused of being a "time waster" if they don't jump at every sexual opportunity and are selective about who they get with. That's why social events are great. You can build up a big of a relationship before opening up your legs for any Tom, Dick, or Harry
ive reported single posing as couples and admin jump straight on it. unfortunately admin cant stop them from creating multiple accounts if they have more then one email. its up to us (the "hardcore" fans) to be vigilant and help admin out
We have lots of tricky things to catch those making multiple accounts ... but we do very much appreciate members telling us when they find little problems
We sometimes think there are two distinct breeds of swingers - those that like to enjoy a leisurely seduction, and those that want to get straight down to business. We fall into the first category. We've on occasion "gone cold" on someone when asked to meet, but usually because the invite to meet has been along the lines of "So you ready to hook up and fuck?" or "How about we meet tonight - does your missus like it up the arse?". Some of the "get down to business" swingers might appreciate that directness, but for us it's a complete turn off.
If going cold after a request like that makes us time wasters, then so be it. Though equally we would think it has been them wasting our time when their behaviour is in flagrant contrast to that which we describe in our profile.
i guess it depends on each persons own veiw as to what constitutes time wasting,,,have i wasted my time in chat speakin with someone and having a laugh only to end up not meeting ,,,no i think not ,,,for me a waste of time is purely a no show or an extremly late cancellation ,,,,fortunatley the one time this has happened to me i had pretty much arrived at the meet point when the cancel came thru ,,,fortuanatly you ask after i had arrived ,,,well yes i had travelled 500k but the meet was not the entire reason for travel..... so i feel i can pretty much say i guarentee not waste anyones time once a date and time has been set
sometimes shit happens ,,pick yourself up , dust yourself off ,and move on
Quote by TemptedTwo We sometimes think there are two distinct breeds of swingers - those that like to enjoy a leisurely seduction, and those that want to get straight down to business. We fall into the first category. We've on occasion "gone cold" on someone when asked to meet, but usually because the invite to meet has been along the lines of "So you ready to hook up and fuck?" or "How about we meet tonight - does your missus like it up the arse?". Some of the "get down to business" swingers might appreciate that directness, but for us it's a complete turn off. If going cold after a request like that makes us time wasters, then so be it. Though equally we would think it has been them wasting our time when their behaviour is in flagrant contrast to that which we describe in our profile.
going cold is different to timewasring, espesally if you let the other know. the point of chat is to see if you gett along. so if you dont no harm done. its the people who , after you have been talking for ages and gettting along, say " yeah im keen, I'll meet you saturday" and never show, never reply or there photo or desription are different. I am talking from exp on multiple sites. i just love it when they start talking to you a mont later, oh something come up lets try this again..... then you have the profile completed by reserchers..... and that could be anyone posing
Have never had this happen, but would annoy the shit out of me. The worst are the ones who do show who have morphed significantly from their profile pics lol
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i will keep quiet
Lots of different reasons bring people to a site like this ....... Ive found people here who have become real life friends who i LOVE spending time with ...
So yeah if you guys do find people who are being deceptive.... Please consider giving this information to a mod so we can deal with it ...
Thanks for reading and have a great weekend ....
I think most sites change .. with such diverse backgrounds and what people expect from the sites they are on ... and in the time I've been here and then became a moderator I have seen many changes, and the dynamics of the group have certainly grown and changed.
Thanks for the input Chris ... its much appreciated.
Jazz
edited to add ... altho is says i joined nov 17 2012 ... my original profile was accidently deleted.. i've been here well over two years now .
