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hendrix1au
Over 90 days ago
Straight Male, 50
0 km · New South Wales
Forum
Warming the Bed
It's my turn this time, and my partner Ellie is taking me on a birthday weekend to Sydney over the 28-30th of August, and we want to fulfill our fantasy of a threesome with another sexy lady for my birthday. We can host in Darling Harbour on the Friday or Saturday night, or perhaps meet through the day if that suits. Maybe lunch / dinner, a few drinks, then back to our hotel room if we all click. 
We are fit, attractive, funny and adventurous professionals and don't take life too seriously, and ideally we would love to find a lady who is a good fit with us, with similar attributes and outlook on life. We are quite flexible with who we meet, but we will not bend on our desire for someone who is drug & disease free, and safe sex is a must. We would prefer a non smoker, but as long as you're not a heavy smoker, and can refrain for a while, we're ok with that too. We love a good laugh, and we look after ourselves, and we would hope that you do too.
We are both aparently pretty spectacular in bed ;) and we quite enjoy having fun in public places too. Not much is off limits to us. 
If you have any dirty ideas, we're very open to them.
Unfortunately, I'm going to have to make this very clear, although there really should be no need to. We do not want to hear from single guys. Ladies only, although possible exceptions may be made for an exceptional couple, though Ellies preference would just be for the male part of any couple to watch. I thought it was very clear last time we put an ad up, but it seems that some single guys just either dont get it, or don't care. You will be blocked and publicly shamed here if you do contact us "just in case we change our minds". We wont. :rude:
We have pics of ourselves in the private album, and these will be available to anyone we think might be worth meeting. Message us if you think we'd like you.
Thanks, Mike and Ellie
We are fit, attractive, funny and adventurous professionals and don't take life too seriously, and ideally we would love to find a lady who is a good fit with us, with similar attributes and outlook on life. We are quite flexible with who we meet, but we will not bend on our desire for someone who is drug & disease free, and safe sex is a must. We would prefer a non smoker, but as long as you're not a heavy smoker, and can refrain for a while, we're ok with that too. We love a good laugh, and we look after ourselves, and we would hope that you do too.
We are both aparently pretty spectacular in bed ;) and we quite enjoy having fun in public places too. Not much is off limits to us. If you have any dirty ideas, we're very open to them.
Unfortunately, I'm going to have to make this very clear, although there really should be no need to. We do not want to hear from single guys. Ladies only, although possible exceptions may be made for an exceptional couple, though Ellies preference would just be for the male part of any couple to watch. I thought it was very clear last time we put an ad up, but it seems that some single guys just either dont get it, or don't care. You will be blocked and publicly shamed here if you do contact us "just in case we change our minds". We wont. :rude:
We have pics of ourselves in the private album, and these will be available to anyone we think might be worth meeting. Message us if you think we'd like you.
Thanks, Mike and Ellie
Warming the Bed
Well, it's getting a bit late now to expect to be able to organise a lady for my girls birthday, and to be honest, I always expected that it would probably be quite a long shot.
I would however, like to acknowledge the half dozen single guys who messaged me. These messages invariably started with "I know you're not looking for a single guy, but...". These messages came despite it clearly being stated in my ad that we are only interested in a lady. So, on behalf of all the decent single guys out there who very respectfully respected our wishes and didn't message us, I'd like to thank these half dozen cockwombles for their inconsiderate and thoughtless correspondence. It's this type of arrogant behaviour that gets all the single guys tarred with the same brush. We know there are some polite, considerate and very worthwhile single guys out there who simply don't get a fair go because of these people, I know, I've been one of them, and I was as frustrated then as I am now.
A little bit of respect and common courtesy goes a long way. Don't expect it in return if you're not willing to afford it to us in the first place.
Warming the Bed
Just bumping this up 
Anyone at all in the Blue mountains / western Sydney areas who might be able to help us out?
Anyone at all in the Blue mountains / western Sydney areas who might be able to help us out?
Warming the Bed
I'm taking my partner on a birthday weekend to the Blue Mountains over the 18-19th of July, and I'd really love to surprise her by fulfilling her fantasy of a threesome with myself and another sexy lady for her birthday. We can host in Lithgow on the Saturday night, or perhaps meet elsewhere if you can host through the day. We are fit, attractive, funny and adventurous, professionals and don't take life too seriously, and ideally we would love to find a lady who is a good fit with us, with similar attributes and outlook on life. We are quite flexible with who we meet, but we will not bend on our desire for someone who is D&D free, and safe sex is a must. We would prefer a non smoker, but as long as you're not a heavy smoker, and can refrain for a while, we're ok with that too.
We have pics of ourselves in the private album, and these will be available to anyone we think might be worth meeting.;) Message us if you think we'd like you.
Thanks, Mike and Ellie
Warming the Bed
Hi Bekkie. My friend Ellie and I are planning a bit of outdoor fun this weekend on the coast if you're interested? She's very bi, very kinky, and keen to find a bit of fun, both outdoor and indoor. Shoot me a message if you'd like to chat further about it. I'll message you our details too so you can contact us directly if you want.
Warming the Bed
I'll be in Tomago today. What time were you planning on being there?
Mike
Warming the Bed
Quote by Curious-couple
Although the original post is to be commended
I agree to a point. The OP sounds quite different from the usual posts you read here but in the end it's just an articulate way of saying "hi, who wants a root?" Or maybe I'm just cynical?
Of course that's what it's saying. That's what every post, every profile (single male, single female, couple, TG etc, etc, etc), every ad, and every chat room session says. If it weren't for sex, none of us would be here. We'd all be off in online knitting forums, or playing video games until our thumbs dropped off, but that's the point. We're more exciting than that. We're after more from life than day to day drudgery. We're after sex. Sex, sex sex, sex, sex, sex, sex! It's just that, as you point out, the OP, and others amongst us are a bit more erudite than average, and can put our point across in a manner which needs to be neither offensive nor dull. It's all well and good to ask for a "root", but unless you drive a panel van, wear flares, have long hair, drink chocolate Moove and still live in the 70's, then that approach probably isn't going to take you far in your sacred quest to get your dicky sticky. Far better to make an effort, show some humour, give respect before expecting it in return, accept that as a guy you're in a vast majority competing for a very small prize pool, and just show some common decency. As the OP (God rest his virtual soul) pointed out, not all single guys are like the neanderthal majority on here, nor like the couples with unrealistic expectations (to play with us, you must have Brad Pitt looks, minimum 14 inch cock (soft), hair the exact colour of Phar Laps mane, with each hair no longer or shorter than 45mm, and balls with no more than a 2% size differential). All we ask is a fair go. I've met some wonderful people on here. Single women, couples, and other blokes as well. Not always for sex, often just for a chat, but in every case, they are people who have reciprocated my effort, and actually taken the time to engage with me, usually because they are good people who just happen to have an interest in sex.
So, I'll come out and proudly and bravely say it. I WANT SEX! I want fun! I want to be judged as a man, not as a sleazebag! I want to write posts and replies of more than one line! I want to give and take compliments! I'd even take a '70's style root if it was offered (must look like Cheryl from Puberty Blues. You know, the one with the big fun bags, who'll do anyone in the back of a Sandman).
Just kidding.
You don't have to look like Cheryl. A Mrs. Vickers lookalike will do. I'm not fussy.
Warming the Bed
Crowne Plaza in Newcastle would be quite good. Nice views out over the harbour, plenty of good restaurants and bars very close by within a couple of minutes walk, and if you fancy a longer walk in the sunshine, Nobbys Breakwall, Fort Scratchley, and a couple of beaches are nearby.
Warming the Bed
I'm still looking........ Anyone?
PS. I've made the medical textbooks with that red weepy thing! Yay for me!
Warming the Bed
I'm still looking........ Anyone?
PS. I've made the medical textbooks with that red weepy thing! Yay for me!
Warming the Bed
C'mon ladies! It's been 3 minutes already. Surely it can't be that hard to find somebody?
Warming the Bed
In the spirit of the very specific ads by some of the women and couples on here, which exclude 99% of the male population ie -
"Wanted, chinese male with one testicle and minimum 9 inch plus cock and 8 pack, with the ability to lick his own arse crack. Must be hairless except for scrotum and between 20 and 21 years old and over 7 feet tall. Must want to fuck my husband while I hit him with a bag of kiwi fruit, and be willing to be filmed by a trained Rhesus monkey smoking a cigar. Must live no more that 6 doors away from us, and be willing to pay for a hotel room before we meet."
"C'mon guys, it can't be that hard to find somebody who meets our criteria!"
I thought I'd try my own impossible ad and see how many genuine responses I get.
So.... Here goes nothing.
Wanted. Single married female, or group of nymphomaniac Roller Derby team mates to do unspeakable things to an old hairy / bald guy with a 2 inch cock and a large goiter on my neck plus a weepy thing that the doctors haven't identified yet. It's red, lumpy, and located somewhere that I can't really get a good look at it. Perhaps you could lance it for me? Must be within the ages of 18 to 27 1/2, weigh no more than 42kg, be between 4ft2 and 6ft9 in height, wear size 6 clothes and wear a 10E bra. Both tits must be perfectly symmetrical with nipples that are permanently hard and are at least 6 inches long. Must be natural blonde with the roots dyed black, and have a shaved pussy, but with a little hair shaved into a perfect representation of Edvard Munch's "The Scream". Must love anal with animatronic Disney characters and have an extensive collection of various coloured butt plugs all shaped like Robert from Everybody Loves Raymond. Must be willing to be filmed and shown to everyone down at the pub. Must have extensive penetrative sexual experience with a minimum of 100 different men. Must be a virgin. Must have references and a current pink slip. Victorias Secret or Bras 'n Things models need only apply.
So.... Here goes nothing.
Wanted. Single married female, or group of nymphomaniac Roller Derby team mates to do unspeakable things to an old hairy / bald guy with a 2 inch cock and a large goiter on my neck plus a weepy thing that the doctors haven't identified yet. It's red, lumpy, and located somewhere that I can't really get a good look at it. Perhaps you could lance it for me? Must be within the ages of 18 to 27 1/2, weigh no more than 42kg, be between 4ft2 and 6ft9 in height, wear size 6 clothes and wear a 10E bra. Both tits must be perfectly symmetrical with nipples that are permanently hard and are at least 6 inches long. Must be natural blonde with the roots dyed black, and have a shaved pussy, but with a little hair shaved into a perfect representation of Edvard Munch's "The Scream". Must love anal with animatronic Disney characters and have an extensive collection of various coloured butt plugs all shaped like Robert from Everybody Loves Raymond. Must be willing to be filmed and shown to everyone down at the pub. Must have extensive penetrative sexual experience with a minimum of 100 different men. Must be a virgin. Must have references and a current pink slip. Victorias Secret or Bras 'n Things models need only apply.
Warming the Bed
Hello to all the lovely Ladies and Genitalmen in the Penrith area! I'll be staying there on Thursday night in a motel somewhere or other, so if any couples or ladies are by any chance interested, I could host a wee gathering. I don't bite, unless you're into that sort of thing, and I don't take myself seriously. It's all a bit of a laugh to me. I have a penis and a face, and all the other bits that you would expect a man to have, so if you're a lady, or a couple with a lady that has boobies and a vajayjay, or a couple of ladies that has a total of 4 boobies and 2 vajayjays (a bloke can dream, can't he?) and you want a good, no hangups evening, then I am your man, or at least one of a thousand men who want a no strings attached root on this site. Choose me though, and you get someone who is intelligent, respectful, not repulsive looking, doesn't smell, is discrete, who can actually spell discrete, and who doesn't lead with "Nice tits. Want a fuck?" I look forward to hearing from anyone who is not a single male. Or 2 single males.
Excelsior!
I'll be staying there on Thursday night in a motel somewhere or other, so if any couples or ladies are by any chance interested, I could host a wee gathering. I don't bite, unless you're into that sort of thing, and I don't take myself seriously. It's all a bit of a laugh to me. I have a penis and a face, and all the other bits that you would expect a man to have, so if you're a lady, or a couple with a lady that has boobies and a vajayjay, or a couple of ladies that has a total of 4 boobies and 2 vajayjays (a bloke can dream, can't he?) and you want a good, no hangups evening, then I am your man, or at least one of a thousand men who want a no strings attached root on this site. Choose me though, and you get someone who is intelligent, respectful, not repulsive looking, doesn't smell, is discrete, who can actually spell discrete, and who doesn't lead with "Nice tits. Want a fuck?" I look forward to hearing from anyone who is not a single male. Or 2 single males.
Excelsior!